Sunday, February 3, 2008

1 mre dae in other words tat means i goin court 2morrow mornin i jus feel nervous or should i sae scared cuz 2morrow will be de dae whereby i will either be sentenced or it will be postpone to after chinese new year all i cn do is to pray hard tat it will be postpone to after chinese new year or i will gt probation so tat atleast i cn have my reunion dinner wit my family and my honey before i gt sentenced or so tat i cn still see my family and my honey if i gt probation..
i m realli feelin damn stress dis few daes lots of tings are goin through my mind i jus dunno wat to do..all of a sudden i feel tat i m so closed to them and wantin to be with them forever and i nw i cn feel de love of my family and nw den i noe hw well my family is instead of last tym i keep tinkin of their weakness and nt lookin at their strength..haiz i feel tat i m sort of late to regret and tink of all dis cuz if i hab done tat earlier i wouldn't hab even land into such disastrous state..maybe i m abit too exaggerate maybe i could sae i wounldn't hab landed into such a state..i jus wish i tat i could rewind de tym wen i was small..where i will study hard or i will give my best in my studies bt i tink it's fate tat make it so tat i would have noe my honey and make a big turn back to GOD and be with him and follow him all the way till i be wit him in heaven..
2dae i wen to meet my bro and my nu'er and we tok abt alot of tings although they didn't help mi much bt atleast they encourage mi and oso atleast i feel de feelin of bein care and after a long dae den i wen to meet my honey bt i felt tat it was sort of too late although i rush there bt i find tat i onli spend alittle tym with her onli..i could hab spend mre tym wit her but i choose to stay there awhile longer i regret stayin there awhile longer in de end i onli spend alittle bit of time with her only and i felt veri sorie to her cuz i made her didn't ate her breakfast lunch and made her ate her dinner so late..i m indeed felt veri remorse and sad tat why did i made her dae so bad and made her hungry fr the whole day...and even made her angry and worrie fr me i realli felt veri sorry..and more ever i didn't even apologize to heri jus dunno wat to sae abt myself..i jus dunno y bt all of a sudden wen i reach home or should i sae wen i sit dwn and start typin my blog i start to tink abt my prob and i start to doubt abt GOD abt weather is he gonna hlp mi out.. bt as i read my brother comments i realized tat i shouldn't do tat as my brother told mi nvr doubt GOD fr he cn move the whole mountain and could separate de oceans fr his son to cross the sea to gt to the other side of de place..so i choose to have faith wit him and stay de right track with fr he is de onli 1 right nw tat cn make miracles and pull mi out of dis place with his hand..so i trust him...i really pray hard tat GOD will save mi frm dis problems or ahould i sae save mi frm all de problems..GOD i indeed have surrender all my life to you lord..PLS save mi...
11:14 PM
A sentimental yearning.